No Longer New: Aliya, the first year

11 months have passed by, since we left behind America, boarded an El-Al charter flight and came home to Israel.
11 months have passed by, since we said goodbye to friends and family, and drove from Boca Raton, Florida, to New York City.
11 months have passed by, since we left the comforts and ease of life in America, and landed in the fast and furious Middle East.

I planned to blog for our one year “Aliyaversary”, but I quickly realized that the kids would all be home, as their camps are almost over (and there’s still a whole 5 weeks of summer vacation to go!), and the chance of me having time to sit and write was slim. It seems appropriate to write the blog post today, 11 months and 1 day after our arrival, as the Nefesh B’Nefesh summer flights have just begun. In fact today, in JFK airport in New York, some 220 people are boarding a flight, right about now, much like ours from last year. Tomorrow morning they will arrive at Ben Gurion airport, they will have their welcome ceremony, similar to that which we had last August, and they will start their new lives as Israelis.

It makes me really happy to say that I know 3 families on that flight. One from Florida, one from Virginia, and one from Colorado. As everything is still so fresh in my mind, I have tried to help each of them as much as possible plan for this move. Whether advising them on what to stock up on for their lift, recommending crates for the dogs, or simply explaining to them some of the “shouldbesosimplebutisnt” things that they will have to deal with upon arrival, I’ve attempted to cover it all.
With their arrival tomorrow their dream will be fulfilled. The days, weeks, months, and often years leading up to making aliya are a work in progress – so many things come into play, faith, beliefs, emotions, money. Once you finally arrive here at your destination, it’s difficult to know what to do next. The first weeks (months) are a mess of bureaucracy, something that many find difficult to deal with – especially those coming from North America. Once all of that is out of the way, your dream is now your reality.

Our reality here in Israel is good. It’s wonderful. I’m not one to tint things with rose colored glasses – you should all know me better than that by now. There are things here that will never be easy, and many people allow those things to become an obstacle to their happiness. In order to be happy here, you simply have to “Let Go, and Let God”, as a well known rabbi from South Florida once said, while sky diving somewhere in Israel. I try hard not to let things get to me. Like waiting almost 5 hours at the driver’s license bureau in Holon, simply to get a piece of paper stamped to allow me to take a test to switch my license over. Yes it was frustrating. No it was not fun. But it was part of the first year full of things that just had to get done. Once it’s done, you never have to do most of those things ever again. (Ok, so grocery shopping, dealing with the bank and post office, are things we kind of have to always do, but you get used to it…)

Tomorrow morning, an airplane full of people will become the newest Olim in Israel. As of tomorrow, the Olim of 2014 become the “vatikim” – the “old timers”. We will always be immigrants, as I wrote a few weeks ago, but we are no longer the newest crop. We still have so much to learn about our new-to-us homeland, and yet we have learned so much that we can impart to the newbies.

I wish all the olim arriving tomorrow hatzlacha raba – much success – and a klita kalla vene’ima – an easy and pleasant absorption. May you enjoy a wonderful first year in Israel, and may it also be your worst year in Israel – let each year get better, and let our love of Israel only grow and strengthen our reserve to stay here, in our homeland, our country.

Aliyah: The Lift

So, you’re making aliyah, and you’ve decided to send a lift. You pick a 20ft container or a 40ft container, and then you try to figure out how to fill it up. If you’re already paying for a whole container, fill it to the brim, no point leaving empty space.
I took an informal poll (read I posted in a number of Facebook groups for Olim) to find out what people from North America wished they had brought more of on their lift, and what items they wish they hadn’t bothered with.
Things got heated, as they do on Facebook. It’s a very personal thing. Once the threads deteriorated into bashing people who bring a lifetime’s supply of white tuna and toilet paper, I simply took the information that was relevant to me, and started writing this post.

I’m not going to discuss furniture. I think that’s a very individual thing. We brought some furniture because if we had sold it in the US, as we would never have made enough money to purchase anything of quality in Israel. We brought some antique chairs that we plan to sell (if you’re in Israel, and interested in genuine antique Syrian chairs, with mother-of-pearl and ivory inlay, please contact me. We have 4 and will sell in pairs).

I’m only going to briefly mention large appliances:
Unless you know for sure that a US sized washer/dryer/fridge/oven will fit in your Israeli home, and you are certain that you will be able to pay the running costs for these appliances, I wouldn’t bother. From the research that I did, I found that the majority of large appliances available as 220V to ship from the US, are not energy efficient, meaning they use a lot of electricity. Electricity is expensive in Israel, keep that in mind.
In addition, a US washer may require to be hooked up to a hot water faucet – most laundry rooms in Israel do not have that option, plus, most people do not have constant hot water here. So if you use your washer with hot water, you won’t have enough hot water to shower, or, if you choose to leave your dud (boiler) on all the time, you’ll run up a massive electric bill.
Also, these non-energy efficient washers are also not frugal with water usage, whereas the European models available here are – I can wash a single shirt in my 8kg European style washer, and it will fill with just the right amount of water for that shirt.
Similarly, most Israelis do not use a dryer regularly. Clothes will dry outside pretty fast. Our landlord has a dryer that we can use, but we only use it for about 20 minutes to fluff up towels, or on really wet days. It’s really expensive to run.
As for refrigerators, space is again an issue – you can get really nice sized fridges here, and you get the warranty to go along with it (this applies to laundry machines too obviously). If you bring a fridge from the US with a built in ice maker and water dispenser, there may not be a way to hook it up in your Israeli kitchen. A lot of the newer fridges on the market here have a semi-automatic ice maker. You fill the trays with water, and when they freeze twist a lever to pour the ice into the ice bucket in the freezer – so you can have constant ice.
I don’t want to discuss ovens at all, because I miss my Frigidaire Professional oven terribly, and really dislike the built in teeny tiny oven that is in our apartment. Sniff.

On to tachlas. The little things. How to fill up that container with the stuff that really matters.
The most common things people wish they had brought more of:
Ziploc bags (available in Israel in Ikea in various sizes, but not everyone has easy access to Ikea)

Trash bags (Very hard to find here that don’t fall apart. Kirkland brand are now available at Osher Ad, but very expensive, so why not ship a few boxes to get you started?)

Plastic containers in all sizes – from food storage size up to clothing storage size (larger bins are easier to find, but are expensive. Purchase in the US and use them to ship clothing and toys instead of boxes. Smaller containers, for food, are crazy expensive here, and not so easy to find in the sizes for kids’ lunches. Had I know, I’d have shipped a case of Gladware containers in various sizes!)

Paper Towels – seriously, Israeli paper towels are not at all absorbant. (Kirkland brand paper towels are available in Osher Ad, again expensive, plus you may not have one near you, so ship as many packages as you can on your lift)

Trash cans (!!) – Kitchen garbage cans are not cheap in the US, in Israel they are exorbitant. Small trash cans, for the bedrooms/bathrooms etc. that you can find for $5 at Target or Walmart, you won’t find for less than $15 in Israel.

Kitchen items – EVERYTHING! Pots, pans, silverware, dishes, sink mats, drainers, baking trays (not too big, or they won’t fit in the oven), Tupperware, EVERYTHING!!!
8×8 Aluminum pans! You can get aluminum pans in Israel, and they’re not expensive, but you cannot get this size. They simply don’t exist here. Ship a case! I wish I had.

Paper products: Plates, bowls, silverware, cups, napkins. It is seriously hard to find good quality paper goods here, and until you find the one store in your area that stocks them, it could take years. I did manage to find our local store in time for Succot (the only time other than Pesach I use paper goods) but I wish I had sent a Costco sized package of plates etc.

Cosmetics – makeup, shampoo, conditioner, shower gel, soap, toothpaste, mouthwash, toothbrushes, razors, shaving gel, wax strips, cleansers, hair products, contact lens solution (and contact lenses)

Medication – anything you take regularly for pain or allergies

Small Appliances: I shipped my Cuisinart and my KitchenAid (and my Pesach Cuisinart). I purchased a heavy duty step-up step down transformer, and they work fine. From what I could find out, better quality small appliances that are not used for long periods of time, will work on the correct transformer for many years. Smaller, cheaper appliances that work harder when they are running, will blow quickly, and are probably not worth bringing. Not recommended: Vacuum Cleaner, steam mop, toaster oven, plata, shabbat urn, hair dryer, immersion blender, hand mixer, coffee maker, iron. If you want to take the chance, go ahead, but in most cases, you should just sell that stuff in the US, and replace each thing one at a time in Israel for a lot more money…
(Irons are so expensive here, that I ordered one from Amazon UK and had my aunt bring it from England for me! Although I believe Amazon UK ships to Israel).

I think I’m going to discuss food items that people send on their lift in a separate post.

Other things mentioned: Clothing and shoes, especially sneakers for kids. (If you’re lucky enough to have kids whose feet fit easily into shoes, go ahead and purchase the next few sizes up in shoes and sneakers. Sadly for me, my kids have super narrow feet and it’s really hard to find shoes in general, I can’t buy ahead). The younger your kids are, the easier it is to buy clothes in bigger sizes. As your kids are older, it’s harder because they want to do their own shopping… Someone suggested school supplies, such as crayons, markers, pencils – but not binders, folders or lined paper, as they sizes are wrong for here.
If your family has sensitive skin, and you use fragrance free detergent – bring as much as you can! It’s impossible to find fragrance free anything here!
If you plan on getting a dryer anyway, ship dryer sheets. They are available here, but they’re expensive.

Obviously, you cannot ship a lifetime worth of anything, but as many of the commentators said on Facebook, if you can make the early stage of life in Israel easier, why not? If it means you don’t have to schlep around trying to figure out where to buy plastic containers for your kids’ school lunch, go for it! Little by little, we all find our way around, and the longer you live here, the shorter the shopping list gets when you visit the U.S. But there is no harm in a little bit of home comforts.

Pack that container til it’s ready to burst!

“Acharei haChagim” – the return to “normal”

Around the time of the High Holy Days (“the Chagim”) – Rosh Hashanah all the way through til the end of Succot – things sort of grind to a halt. It’s busy season. Stores are full, traffic is crazy, it’s high season for tourists, and nothing much gets done outside of holiday prep. So, even though school began September 1st, we have known that only “acharei haChagim” would the kids start getting the extra Hebrew help they are entitled to as Olim. We knew that job hunting would be slow, because no one hires before or during the Chagim. There’s not a lot of point trying to accomplish very much at all.  Unless you purchase things for your kitchen or home – those are on sale before the Chagim, but never again afterwards.

So now it’s finally “Acharei haChaim” and things should start to get back to normal. The question however, is, what the heck is considered “normal” here?

The Holidays were wonderful. Our new shul was a great place to daven (pray) on Rosh haShanah and Yom Kippur. My parents joined us in Israel for Succot, which was fabulous, and a large number of our friends from Boca were also in Israel over Succot, and we did get to spend time with most of them. We rented a car for the few days of Chol HaMoed, and were able to go to Gush Etzion, Jerusalem, Netanya – for a Boca bat mitzvah – and to an archaeological dig at Beit Guvrin. Not having school allowed the kids to relax and just enjoy life here. We built a large succah in our yard, and it was a lovely change to not need fans! What a difference to Boca – Succot in Israel is actually pleasant. I wasn’t yearning for the much coveted air conditioned succah of my cousin in Boca. In fact, we really dwelled in our succah this year. We didn’t sleep outside, but we ate our meals, sat reading, davened and simply hung out in the succah.

And then, after Shabbat, “chozrim laShigra”, as they say (return to schedule). The kids went back to school on Sunday. No, that wasn’t pleasant – I will always lament the loss of Sundays. It’s time for me to start my work, running a mobile manicure business. I now have full weeks to work, and hopefully the kids having full weeks at school (just not full days – the younger ones are home by 2 most days!) will allow me to at least get started. I also purchased a washing machine finally. After all the days of chag, and the excess laundry produced (plus excess sheets and towels from having guests), my neighbor’s generous loan of the little washing machine that leaks just had to come to an end.

I ordered the washer from the same store I purchased my fridge. They might not be the easiest to bargain with (they seem to stick to their prices and maybe knock off delivery at best) but they seem like decent people, and I’ve been told by others that they stick by their products. When we bought the fridge, it was next day delivery, and the delivery guy unpacked it and plugged it in. I did have to call a technician to come and validate the warranty. Yup – the guy from Samsung had to come to my apartment, look at the fridge and explain to me how it works. So I was prepared to be told that a similar system was in place for the washer. Correct.

So, the washer was available for next delivery. I was given a 7 hour window. Luckily it arrived within the first 2 hours. The delivery guys brought it up and then announced they wouldn’t be able to fit it through the door to the laundry room without unpacking it, and they are not allowed to unpack it. Only the technician can do that. So they dumped it in the middle of the living room. And left. But not without demanding a tip. Even though we paid for delivery and they did nothing but roll it into the elevator and then into our apartment. I could have done that myself. (They used a dolly – give me a dolly, I can move anything). So now, here is my  lovely new washing machine:

See how the white contrasts so beautifully with the wood on the china cabinet? And clashes with the shiny tile floor? There it will sit for two days, because the earliest I could get a technician to come out is on Wednesday afternoon. He will hopefully not get annoyed that he has to move it into the laundry room. And then he will plug it in, hook it up and explain to me how to use it. I’m sure it’s more complicated than a fridge. I wonder how much more laundry we can drum up between now and Wednesday night…

So yeah, what is normal again?

May we all be inscribed – Aliya Part VI

Rosh Hashana in Israel. Jewish holidays in Israel in general. To experience this, not as a tourist (which I only ever did once when I was 10 years old, and spent Succot in Israel with my family & grandparents), is extremely special.

Yes the shops are packed, and there are crowds everywhere. Yes you may have to wait hours at the bakery for sweet round challah. Yes, the kids will have barely any school for the next few weeks. But YES, this is because it is the Jewish new year! It’s not some holiday for some other religion, that has little to no affect on us, other than to be inconvenient because the supermarket is closed when I need to go. It’s for my holiday! The buses say “Shana Tova” (Happy New Year) on them. You call the electric/water/gas company to pay a bill and they wish you “Shana Tova” before getting off the phone. This is our country, this is our homeland, and this is our faith, practiced in the land given to our forefathers by God.

We have been in Israel for 6 weeks now. Our lift finally arrived, Baruch Hashem, a week ago. What felt like an empty vacation apartment has suddenly turned into our home, with our furniture, our dishes, our photographs, our books, my nail polish… The dog has her patio table to sit under again. The kids have their clothing, their toys, their special things. I have proper coffee mugs. We are truly at home now. Having the lift arrive so close to Rosh Hashana was in many ways a blessing, as it motivated us to get unpacked as quickly as possible. While we do still have some closed boxes (that don’t contain Pesach stuff), we are mostly unpacked, we have found everything we need (except that brand new box of kitchen glasses from Bed, Bath & Beyond – they’ll show up when we move again), and I have been cooking and (attempting to) baking for Yom Tov.

As the Day of Judgement approaches, and we each have our own demons to face, I’d like to say publicly that I have faced mine. The biggest demon in my life was my reluctance to return to Israel. It was something that followed me for 16 years. Like a voice whispering in my ear, every time the prayer for Israel was said in shul, every time a friend made aliya, every time a friend went on vacation to Israel, every time Israel was in the news, the voice saying “you know you want to be there.” And my own voice always over powering that voice and saying “No I do not. I’m right where I want to be.” It took many years for my voice to become the whisper, and for the other voice to become louder. And while I can’t explain what exactly changed, or why I suddenly felt “ready”, it certainly feels like a demon has been conquered.

Making aliya is not easy. Making aliya with a family is even more difficult. As positive as my posts have been since we arrived in Israel, I admit that it’s not easy. There are challenges that you can’t imagine before you arrive, even if you think you know about them. I just listened to the community panel from the Boca Raton Synagogue from last Saturday night, about aliya , and it resonated with me. Even if you do speak good Hebrew (I do), you won’t understand how things work. Even if you have lived here before (I have), don’t expect to jump right in where you left off. Even if your kids are excited to be here (they were not), don’t expect them to immediately be happy at school. Even if the school is helping your kids with Hebrew (they are), don’t expect the kids to suddenly start speaking it (they don’t/won’t).

But don’t let these things be the reason to NOT make aliya. If aliya is in your heart, just do it. If you feel that Israel is your homeland, just come. Don’t tell me “it’s not that easy” – I know! Do your homework, move somewhere that has a network of people who can help you. If you need to, move to a city where there are lots of Anglos. If you want to move somewhere more Israeli, find out ahead of time whether there is any kind of Anglo community there, and if they are set up to help new Olim. Speak to as many people as you can, from Boca, from elsewhere, who have made aliya to those exact places that you are looking into. Even if they made aliya 5 years ago, they are still Olim. They can still remember what it was like in the beginning. They will give you the best advice about schools, shuls, supermarkets, apartments, cars, jobs – everything. Don’t be afraid to ask “stupid” questions. Understand that you WILL need those English speakers, even if you are fluent in Hebrew. It’s nothing to be embarrassed by. As great as Nefesh b’Nefesh is at coordinating the paperwork, and managing flights and ceremonies, once you arrive, you need to be in a place where, daily, you have people who can help you. Go on a pilot trip – even if you spend every summer in Israel and think you know where you want to be – you may end up finding a completely different place. We moved to Rehovot, having only spent a brief 30 hours here last December over Shabbat! And what a great decision it was.

Wishing everyone, in Israel, and in the Galut, a Shana Tov, and may we all confront our personal demons, and take them out in 5775.

אם תרצו, אין זו אגדה – If you want it, it’s not a dream (Theodore Herzl ז”ל)

Part V: Why they say you need $100K in the bank

One of the things people say to you when you tell them you want to make aliya is “I hope you can afford it, you need at least $100K in the bank”. The answer of course, should always be “Hashem will provide”… right?

So here’s the thing, you can budget up the wazoo, and you’re still going to spend more money than you ever thought possible when it comes to making aliya.

You can spend months working on budget spreadsheets, calculating the cost of your lift, rent, cars, groceries, utilities, incidentals and more. And it will all go to pot once you arrive.

First: The lift. So you pick a 40ft container, you go with the company in your departure country that you feel happy with and you get a price. Everyone tells you don’t worry, you’ll get screwed somewhere. Believe them. You will. Thankfully, the moving company that we worked with were fine to deal with on the US side, and there haven’t really been too many issues on the Israel side, other than that extra two weeks added to the original shipping time… Our lift arrived in the port of Ashdod on Monday, was released from meches (customs) this morning, and God Willing, will be delivered to our apartment Sunday. Thank you God. By that time it will have been almost 5 weeks since we landed. I don’t actually remember what my dishes look like, or how many bottles of nail polish I boxed up (crikey, where on earth am I putting those?!). I don’t remember what it’s like to sleep on a bed, or to have a hamper for dirty laundry. I know I own more clothes than the ones I’ve been wearing for the last 7 weeks, but it will be like going on a big shopping spree when I unpack the wardrobe boxes.
Whatever they tell you that you’ll pay for the lift, you will pay more. There will be the charges on one side, and regardless, there will be charges on the Israel side, and they will be higher than you’re initially told. Deal with it and budget for it.

Second: Rent – presumably, like us, you have a budget for renting and you include utilities. Remember that in Israel you also pay Arnona (municipal taxes) and, if you’re in an apartment building, va’ad bayit (building maintenance). The price of these vary on city and location within the city. Olim Chadashim are entitled to an Arnona discount for one out of the first two years of making aliya – important to know, and must be taken care of at the Municipality of the city in which you live.

Third: Groceries. It’s not that groceries are more expensive in Israel, although some things are. It’s that you will be completely overwhelmed by the grocery stores, and will not know what to buy. You will be so overwhelmed trying to figure out what you are looking for and where to find it, that you are unlikely to remember to price check until you  get to the register and your bill is exorbitant. And allow yourselves at least 2 hours each time you shop at first, because it will take that long to find what you are looking for. Ask locals where they shop for what, and understand that it might be worth it to shop at multiple stores to get better prices.

Fourth: Schools. Yes there is public religious school in Israel. No, you do not pay tuition. However, you have to buy all the text books in addition to school supplies. Text books are expensive. Keep in mind that you can buy used, and it will save some money. By the way, shopping for school supplies was also completely overwhelming. I highly recommend going with a friend who speaks Hebrew, and/or finding a store where you can just hand them the list and ask them to put it all together for you.

Fifth: Transportation – there are many cities in Israel that make it easy to live without a car. Public transport here is fairly decent, and taxis are not outrageously expensive. However, keep in mind, that from time to time, you will need a car. Sometimes it just is not practical to get places without one. So far, we do not have a car, although we do plan to get one. We rely mostly on the local buses, and from time to time taxis. We rented a car for a week to enable us to get a little further and shop for some larger items, and we also rented a small car for a day when we needed to do them same thing a few weeks later. Most grocery stores will deliver – you can shop there, and tell them you want a “mishloach” and then you box it up and they deliver it to your home a few hours later for about the same cost as taking a taxi home, or you can shop online and have it delivered without ever setting foot in the store. The problem with that, is that until you are familiar with what you’re shopping for, it can be tricky to figure out in Hebrew.

I’ve outlined just a few things to consider financially, there are many, many more. If you are looking into purchasing appliances in Israel, do some research ahead of time, keep in mind that they use European sizing here for things such as fridges (measured in liters, not cubic feet), washers & dryers (measured based on weight they hold rather than volume). Also remember that delivery is rarely included in the price, and that Israeli law requires that appliances are installed by a certified technician or the warranty is invalidated. You have to schedule the technician to come out separately to the delivery. So, for example, if you purchase a washing machine and the store can deliver it the next day, keep in mind that the technician may not be able to come the same day, and you won’t be able to use your washer for another couple of days.

So, back to the first line. is $100K enough? There is no answer truthfully. if you have enough money to purchase things outright, good for you. If you don’t, and you need to purchase things in installments (very common in Israel, for everything from groceries to cars), remember that initially the bank will not want to give you a real credit card, and can take up to 3 months before they will issue it. The same goes for checks. They will not give you checks right away. In addition, some appliance stores will not accept foreign credit cards. So, just some more things to keep in mind.

Shabbat shalom from my still spacious apartment, that next week will feel a lot smaller!

Part IV: Why Rehovot: Because this!

When Keith & I returned from our pilot trip in December 2013, the obvious question was “so nu, where are you moving to?”

We were at friends’ for lunch our first Shabbat back, and we both said that we had narrowed it down to two possibilities. Those of you who know Keith & I well, are aware that we rarely agree on much if anything. So you will not be surprised when we each had a different first possibility that we had narrowed it down to. But, the second city out of our mouths was “Rehovot”. So we looked at each other, gave that one sided Israeli shrug, and said “Guess we are making aliya to Rehovot then”. And that was how we decided. From that moment on, people asked “Why Rehovot?” usually followed closely by “are there any Americans there?” – to which Keith liked to answer “None! That’s why we’re going there!” But that’s really not the case.

So, why Rehovot? There were a number of things that attracted us.

First and foremost: Schools. All the other cities we visited, when it came to talking to locals about schools, there were many opinions. We were advised against sending our kids to the public schools in some places, because they’re just not so great, or told that we could send to public schools, but then to expect to shell out a lot of money for tutors. In Rehovot, almost everyone sends their kids to the public elementary school. In fact, many of the people at our shul, are graduates of the religious elementary school in Rehovot themselves! For Middle/High School for girls there were a number of options, all of which sounded great, and we were happy for our 12 year old to have a choice of where to go. So far she is very happy with her decision.

Second: It’s an Israeli city. Meaning, when you walk around Rehovot you don’t hear English. You hear a lot of Russian, but you hear mostly Hebrew. This was extremely important to us – for us, and for our kids. We didn’t want to live in a location that had a lot of English speakers, we wanted to be somewhere that would force us to learn Hebrew, to speak Hebrew, and to integrate as much as possible, which brings me to:

Third: And this really, is parallel in importance to schools – community. A lot of Anglos who make aliya move to Anglo areas in order to have that sense of community that exists outside of Israel. Which makes sense – because complete integration into Israeli society is near impossible if you didn’t grow up here, go to the army and/or marry an Israeli. (Truthfully, the same can be said about integrating into most societies around the world – it’s difficult to do if you’re an immigrant.) In many synagogues around Israel, it is simply the place you go to pray. You show up for minyan, you daven, you leave. When we  visited Rehovot for a Shabbat, we experienced a shul that was like most synagogues outside of Israel. The Berman Shul. There is a kiddush weekly after services where people socialize and children play. Many of the members of the synagogue are English speaking. For us this was ideal. Living in a very Israeli city, but knowing that on Shabbat and holidays we have a shul to go to where we can easily communicate and socialize.

In the almost four weeks that we’ve been living here, this community aspect of the Berman Shul, has proven to be a most excellent choice. From the moment we landed we have been taken care of. Our empty apartment was filed with mattresses, sheets, towels, basic kitchen utensils and food. We’re still waiting for our lift to arrive (Please God, this week!), and in that time, we have been invited out every single Shabbat for meals. In addition, we are without a car, and I get daily calls from friends who are going grocery shopping to find out if I need to come with. We have had help in getting what we needed for the kids to start school.

All this help is coming from members of our new shul, our new community. Not a single Shabbat has passed without people coming up to us in Shul and introducing themselves. This is especially impressive, as we’re not the only newcomers to Rehovot over the summer. In fact, while many people still ask “How come Rehovot?” it turns out, it’s actually the “in place” now. In the space of just a few weeks, the shul welcomed 5 new families, and over the last few months even more families arrived.

The really beautiful thing about this community is the inter-generational connection. Something that struck us about Rehovot when we visited was the number of people our age who had grown up here, gone to the army and college, gotten married and then moved back to Rehovot. There are generations of families living here. It’s a place where you make your home. Last night, I was privileged to be invited to a friend’s house after Shabbat. There were about 40 women there, many old-timers in Rehovot, many as new as me. The age range was from 20s to 50s. For a long time, my friends have all been similar ages to me. You tend to gravitate towards people at a similar life stage. Then you can kvetch about the stuff you are going through, and try and convince each other it is normal. But having friends at different life stages is also beneficial. Like the people we ate lunch at yesterday, who made aliya nearly 20 years ago, with children the ages mine are now. Those people can look at us, hear what we say about some of the more difficult aspects of making aliya, and tell us, for real, that it will all be fine.

You should never underestimate the importance of having a community, and to have a community where everyone works together to help each other, without asking for anything in return, is what creates a warm, welcoming environment, and makes new members want to stay, to integrate, and to eventually become part of the welcoming committee themselves.

Thank you members of Berman Shul Rehovot, for making our landing soft, and for showing us that we made the right decision!

 

Part II

The kids are now practically Israeli (just not the Hebrew speaking kind). They drink chocolate milks from bags, know where the nearest makolet (mini-mart) is, go alone to the park and know how to use the “rav kav” card thingamabob on the buses.

We’re definitely still on our “aliyah-moon” – even when I get annoyed about things, I manage to brush it off with “yiyeh b’seder” (it’ll be ok) and get on with things. The hardest thing we dealt with last week, was not our first siren (that came last Tuesday night) but hearing that our lift would not reach the port in Ashdod until September 8th, and therefore we won’t have our stuff until some time after that. I stewed over that for a few hours, because as pioneering as I am (those of you who know me well, are no doubt snorting liquid out from your nostrils right now at the thought of me being a pioneer at all….) spending another 3 weeks at least without a real cooking utensil, and more importantly, without my make up and nail polish, is really just a  bit much. I can sleep on a mattress on the floor. I can wash the same towels and sheets over and over. I can even manage to cook with the few things people have lent us, and hopefully we will get a real fridge soon which will enable me to shop for more than a day at a time.

But I really want my clothes. I’m tired of the few things I’ve been wearing non stop for 3 weeks. I want to do my nails. Everywhere we go people ask me what my work is here, and I tell them “I’m a certified nail professional”. They probably think I’m certifiable because my nails are unpolished and boring. Oh well. Yiyeh b’seder…

So, we had our first “azaka” (siren) last Tuesday night. It was about 10:45pm, all the kids were in bed, and Keith & I were working on stuff on laptops. The noise started, we glanced at each other for a split second, and both said “oh, that is definitely a siren”. In that split second, our 12 year old woke up, left her bedroom, went straight into the safe room (our 10 year old’s bedroom), opened the window and pulled shut the sealed shutters. Like a pro. Keith picked up our sleeping 7 year old, the dog followed us all, and into the room we went. Our 10 year old woke up only after the siren had stopped and said “what are you all doing in my room?” The 7 year old woke up briefly, and the dog farted, which really was enough to make everyone wish away those 10 minutes really, really fast… No one panicked, no one was scared, everyone went straight back to sleep, and that was that. It did prompt some interesting conversations the next day. Everywhere we went, the kids paid attention, and asked where we would go for cover if there was another siren. But not in any way that makes us  believe they were scared. They are just aware now. 90 seconds is a long time to get to safety, as long as you’re in a built up area. We are lucky, in the south, they only have 15 seconds.

We dealt with more bureaucracy during the week too, with a visit to the Absorption Ministry (how many countries have one of those, by the way? A ministry dedicated solely to helping immigrants?) We learned about the “sal klita” – the absorption basket – money that we will start to receive shortly, and Keith was given information about Ulpan (Hebrew classes). Ulpan, by the way, is 100% free, plus the Absorption Ministry reimburses you 90% of your travel expenses! What a country. 

We got everyone fully signed up for health care. For the first year it is completely free. Imagine that! When I moved to the US from the UK, it was next to impossible for me to get health insurance as an individual who was willing to pay for it, let alone get anything for free! After the first year, health insurance is covered by the Israeli equivalent of social security, but the cost is negligible compared to what you pay in the US. I’m not  going to argue with anyone over the quality of Israeli vs US healthcare, I’ll just say that I’ve lived in Ireland, Israel, the UK and the US, and the US has by far the absolute worst health care system, and Israel has by far the very best. Nothing is perfect.

We went to purchase textbooks for the kids for school. School is free, but the parents buy the books. I was completely overwhelmed when we walked into the store. So I asked if I could possibly leave the lists with them, and come pick up the books when they were ready. They told me yes. When I told someone this in synagogue on Shabbat she said “oh you’re already so Israeli!” – And there was me thinking it was a very Boca thing to do!

Our 12 year old starts school on Thursday. She has an orientation on Wednesday afternoon. Today we drove by her school to see where it is, as we had no idea. It’s a brand new  building, just completed this summer, and from the outside it looks very, very nice. A large building, on lots of campus grounds. She’s a little nervous, but also excited. She has met a number of girls that she will be in school with, and 7th grade is the entrance grade at the school, so it’s new to all of them. She has a late start this year, compared to last year – she’ll be picked up by the bus at 7:15 instead of 7, and the bus is picking her up outside our building. Score!

We have rented a car for the week, so we can explore a little further outside of Rehovot. I have a special birthday coming up on Wednesday. I really wanted a Nespresso coffeemaker for my birthday, but instead, it looks like I will be getting either a bed, a fridge, a washer, or if I’m very lucky indeed, a printer…

Yiyeh B’seder!

 

Ein Li Eretz Acheret (I have no other land/country)

It’s the eve of Yom HaZikaron (Memorial Day) as I write this. My Facebook timeline is filling up with blue and white, with photos of memorial candles, and pictures of Israeli soldiers. There is also video footage from various wars Israel has fought, and from the declaration of the State in 1948.

Every year, since I left Israel in October of 1998, I find it so incredibly hard to be out of Israel on these two days. Nowhere can recreate the feeling of being in Israel on Yom HaZikaron and Yom Ha’Atzmaut (Independence Day). No matter how moving a ceremony you participate in, it cannot compare with the ceremony at the Kotel, or on Har Herzl. No matter how fun the local celebrations are for Yom Ha’Atzmaut, it cannot compare with the fireworks, the flyovers, the barbecues that clog up the medians, and the hiking throughout Israel. If I ever question my Zionism, my commitment to the Jewish State, these are the 2 days that have reminded me constantly, for 16 years, that Israel is still my homeland, and that I will go back one day.

This year, it’s no easier, except for the fact that G-d Willing, this is my last time being out of Israel for these two days. If everything goes as planned, next year we will be in Israel for Yom HaZikaron & Yom Ha’Atzmaut. My children will experience the sirens of Yom HaZikaron for the first time in real life (as opposed to on a screen). They will hopefully be incredibly proud to take part in Yom Ha’Atzmaut celebrations, as new Israelis, maybe even Hebrew speaking Israelis by then. I look forward to barbecuing with new neighbors, watching fireworks, going out on the town, and watching the Israeli airforce fly over the country.

As our time draws closer, people keep asking if I’m excited. I answer no. They ask if I’m nervous, I answer no to that also. They ask how I do feel, and I can’t answer truthfully. My emotions are mixed. On the one hand, I am going home, back to the land that truly allows the Jewish people to live Jewish lives. The calendar is based on Jewish holidays. The week is based around Saturday being the Sabbath. On the other hand, I’m leaving the placed I’ve called home for the past 13 years, the friends I’ve made, the house I love (and yes it’s on the market, if you know anyone looking for a house in a fabulous neighborhood in Boca, put them in touch with me!), the conveniences that make the US such a great place to live. I’m moving to a country where no one will argue that life is easy. I’m moving to a city where I know very few people. I’m moving from a house to an apartment, leaving a pool & a backyard, my fruit trees, my two car garage. I’m leaving many comforts, and an easy way of life. So how can I be excited? That’s a lot to leave behind.

So why am I not nervous? Should I be nervous? After all, starting again gets harder, the older you get, and this time, unlike the other 3 times I’ve moved to a different country, I’m doing it with 3 kids and a dog in tow. I’m not nervous, because in my heart of hearts I know, and Keith knows, that we are doing what is best for our children. There is no better place to raise Jewish children than in Israel. This is not about education, contrary to what some people have said to me. We are not moving to Israel because of the cost of tuition for Day School in the US. If that was the case, we’d have moved years ago! But to have my kids grow up Israeli, with that special brand of independence, and, dare I say, arrogance that is unique to Israelis, that is a gift that I can give to them. It is a gift that they are currently not excited to receive, but G-d Willing, in time, they will thank us for it.

For now I leave you with the song that for me, and so many others, epitomizes how Israel makes me feel: